How to overcome shyness and increase confidence – Skillopedia – Personality Development

September 30, 2019

Me? You want me to give a full presentation?
You know I’m shy, I can’t do it. Now has that ever happened to you? Are you one of those
people who’s generally shy by nature? And finds it difficult to communicate with people
especially crowds? Well let me tell you that you are not alone. Millions of people all
over the world struggle with shyness and the good news is that you can overcome shyness. Well my name is Rima and today we are going
to talk about ways and means in which you can overcome shyness. Now the first thing I want to tell you is,
accept yourself. That’s right, it seems difficult, and it seems like something very,
very tough to do. But trust me accepting yourself for who you are, is the first step to overcoming
shyness and I’m going to explain to you why. Now let’s say you want to be a certain way
because society or people expect you to be a certain way. Remember that you are who you
are and you are who you are for a reason. The universe wanted you to be a certain way
for a reason. Maybe you have a few lessons to learn, so the first step is, accept, accept,
accept yourself for whoever you are, however you are. that is the first step to wanting
to change yourself because if you were completely accept your own personality then you can work
upon your personality, it’s as easy as that. So like let me tell you, when I was in school,
I was a very, shy timid girl. It took me many, many years to actually become open and confident
and overcome my shy nature. So we are all work in progress, nobody’s perfect. Accept
yourself, be who you are, because that will make you appear confident. Once you start
appearing confident, you’ll start feeling confident and you will be able to overcome
your shy nature. So remember no matter who you are, you’re amazing, just accept yourself. So you’re serious about overcoming your shyness?
Well I’m going to tell you one thing, find your front row. No who is your front row?
Let me explain. Imagine that you are performing on stage, you know may be you are acting or
singing, who would you like as your front row audience? naturally you are going to pick
the people that you love the most, the people who love you, cherish you and support you
unconditionally, which means your loving family and friends. So that’s right, they are your
front row in life. What you need to do is, you need to start focusing on overcoming your
shyness with them first. So try to talk to them more, try to open with them more. So
as you continue to do this in your safe zone among people who understand you completely,
you will slowly be able to strangers as well. So start with your front row and push yourself
out of your comfort zone and that’s going to take you very far in overcoming your shyness. Another effective way of overcoming shyness,
is to stop the comparison game. That’s right, we all end up comparing ourselves to so many
other people in the world. But you know what, if you stop comparing yourself with people
and are happy and content to be who you are, you will find that people respect you more.
That’s right and you will start respecting yourself more that way. So learn that you
are unique so is everyone else, you can’t compare one with the other. Be yourself and
just to be comfortable with your own skin, that’s right. You know like they always say
people who are confident dressers enjoy carrying the clothes they wear. Similarly, if you are
comfortable in the shell of your body and your personality, you’ll appear confident,
you’ll appear relaxed, you’ll appear at ease and then if at all you notice a single personality
flaw in yourself, like for example you think, you need to work upon your shy nature, you’ll
do it with a lot of self-love and with lot of respect towards yourself. The key is don’t
put yourself down, don’t compare yourself with anyone else, coz that is not going to
help you overcome anything. Overcome your shyness by respecting yourself, loving yourself
and realizing that you really are unique. So if you are serious about overcoming your
shyness, let me tell you that you need to break out of your shell. That’s right, now
as a shy person it seems very safe and comfortable to live in your shell. But you need to break
out of it, if you really want to overcome your shy nature. Like for example, as a shy
person, you may not go to certain places where there are a lot of people or not attend certain
parties or public gatherings. Now slowly, slowly you need to come out of your shell
and start attending events that you otherwise would not have attended. Let’s say there’s
a party coming up, you normally skip that party every year. But this year, you make
a determination that yes I’m going to overcome my shy nature and actually end up attending
the party. Now take baby steps at first, you don’t need to attend the party and stay there
till dawn. You could attend the party for 2 hours, make an attempt to actually socialize
and talk to people and come back. And when you realize the experience is not so bad,
that will encourage you to attend the next public gathering which is full of strangers
who normally make you very nervous and anxious. And let me tell you one thing, for human beings,
habits are very important. If you make a habit of talking to strangers of socializing, slowly,
slowly you will adapt to it, your nature will adapt to it and before you know it, you will
be out of your shell and you won’t be so shy anymore. So like I’m saying, wanna overcome
your shyness, break out of that shell. So talking about overcoming your shyness right?
Would you like to talk to a person who is kind of standing like this? who is slouching,
whose posture is all over the place or whose posture shows you that he or she is nervous,
restless, timid, worried. Just wants to go into a corner and hide. Clearly not, which
is why I’m saying perfect your posture. That’s right, when you want to overcome
your shyness, make sure that you are paying attention to your posture. If your shoulders
are slouching, if you are appearing timid, naturally people will consider you to not
be confident. People will think you are shy and you don’t like people and they are not
going to approach you. I would say, however nervous you are feeling, straighten your spine,
pull back your shoulder, stand straight, and appear confident. When you appear like that,
people will take you seriously and you will start feeling more confident than you are
and over a period of time, you’ll start enjoying that feeling of confidence, you’ll start enjoying,
being taken seriously and you will step out of your shyness. So if you are trying to overcome your shyness,
I want to tell you one thing and I wanna tell you that one thing with caution. Do not give
up. Now in the beginning all your efforts are going to be awkward, they are going to
be uncomfortable. They are going to be way out of your comfort zone. But you know that’s
how it is with most things. When you were a baby and you were trying to learn how to
walk, i don’t think you would have gotten it right on the first attempt. With a lot
of help from your family members and your mother, you probably got it right after a
while. It’s the same thing with anything new that you are trying to do. If you are trying
to overcome your shyness, not everyone is going to be supportive, not everyone is going
to be open to talking to you. You are going to face rejection. You are going to face certain
awkwardness, a certain discomfort with certain people. Now just because some people treat
you badly, the whole world is not bad. Make sure that you do not lose hope, make sure
that you do not give up and you continue to make your efforts to overcome your shyness.
And I promise you, yes it’s Rima’s promise, gradually, slowly and steadily, you are going
to get there and you’re going to be able to put your shyness behind you. So talking about overcoming shyness are we?
Well then, make that list. Now what list am I talking about? I’m telling you that you
need to make a list of all the activities and tasks that make you feel all awkward,
uncomfortable, nervous, shy, scared, intimidated, all of that. Make a list of such things, such
tasks and then commit to that list. Yes, you need to do every task on that list with due
diligence and sincerity without cheating. And yes you can start with a task that makes
you the least nervous and then gradually you move on to the task that makes you
The most nervous in front of people. Slowly and steadily, as you start practising the
things from this list, you will see yourself becoming more open, more confident and then
one fine day, you will snap out of your make sure you make that list and et kicking,
if you really want to overcome your shyness. So I hope you got a lot of helpful pointers
to overcome your shyness from this video and I’m going to take your leave, I’m going
to catch you with the next video. But before I go, I wanna tell you one thing, slow and
steady wins the race and remember you maybe be a shy person and there’s nothing wrong
with that. But deep inside of you, is hidden a wonderful human being with a great personality,
just remove the wrapping paper of your shyness and unleash your true personality. So do subscribe
to our channel, Skillopedia, the place to learn skills for the real world.

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